Day 21

AAAAARGH- still no word whether we have been accepted or not.  Last Friday we got a letter in the mail that stated that they recieved our application and would let us know when they heard back from our doctor and our priest.  Scary that these two references are so huge.  So, we sit, and we wait.  Just as we have done for the last four and a half years.  If the wait to get started is this stressful for us, I can't imagine how the next four years will go.  Pray for us, please!

Day 14

Well, we have not heard anything back yet.  I am hoping this is not a bad sign.  Of course, this long wait has me second guessing our decision, and turning the anxiety on again.  Ugh, how will I ever make it through a 6 month interview, and a 3-4 year wait?  What doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right?  I am seriously hoping for the latter!  Aaron and I have been keeping busy with a lot of things, which makes this wait a little less frustrating.  I think during the next 3-4 years, we will continue to be very busy people!  Passing the time is much better with hobbies, goals, and activities.  Now that it's getting colder outside, we will start going to the YMCA more often, and going for fewer walks.  My fingers are crossed to hear from our social worker in the next few days:)

Day 2

Alright, I know I promised to try to be a patient human being, and I will be soon enough.  In the meantime, I have been a researching maniac, trying to decide if there is anything we should be doing before our home study process begins.  I am hoping to hear back from our Social Worker within two weeks.  If we haven't heard anything by the end of the month, I will probably call to see if we missed anything in our packet. 
The application itself was not terribly difficult, but it was time consuming, as we had to describe in detail our life history.  The home study will be the more difficult process.  We will have to describe in detail our parenting philosophy, our extended families' backgrounds, our upbringings and relationships we have with our siblings, parents, friends, and coworkers.  As excited as I am to begin this journey, I know there will be moments of stress for both Aaron and I.  We will also have a lot of training courses to attend.  While we look forward to the adventure, we are a big ball of nerves right now!
If I was a nail biter, they'd be down to the bone, lol:)

The Ball is Rolling!

Even though I don't plan to invite anybody to view this for quite some time, today was a momentous day for us, and it should be documented.  We completed and turned in our application to be considered for adoption to the adoption agency that we thought was the best match for us.  I am feeling about ten thousand emotions as I consider how huge of a step this was for us.  First, we are so excited to embark on this journey.  We are not disillusioned into believing this will be an easy, fast, or uncomplicated path, but we are so excited to see how it all unfolds.  We are anxious to begin the next steps, which will be to complete a home study after we pass the state required background checks, and the references required by our agency.  And part of us will always be heartbroken, as we start this new chapter, we are reminded of the miracles that were ours for too short of a time, our sweet twins, Savannah and Charlie.  We remember how close we were to having all of our dreams come true, and how very quickly things changed for us.  While we will never understand why they weren't here to stay, we appreciate the time we spent with them, and are thankful that they left together, and will have each other for eternity.  Our dreams have changed, and our plan has changed, but the outcome hasn't.  Our goal has been to become parents, and there are more children in store for us.  We are thrilled to prepare for our future children, and can't wait to begin the next portion of the process.  Tonight, while saying our bedtime prayers, we will continue to include patience for ourselves, and we will also pray that we don't drive our social worker crazy as we are so eager to begin:)